Tag Archives: we had a cleaning lady with the same problem
“All right, girls,” Mr. Jaworski said, sitting down behind Mr. Collins’ desk. “I guess the first thing we’ll do is take attendance.” It took almost half an hour for Mr. Jaworski to call out all the names of the girls in the class, noting that Elizabeth was missing. “OK. Now that we’ve done that, let’s all read our textbooks quietly to ourselves.”
“But we don’t even have textbooks,” Amy said. “Mr. Collins usually just talks to us about his own experiences with the female reproductive system.”
“Well, I’m afraid I can’t do that,” said Mr. Jaworski, pushing his glasses up his nose.
“Because you don’t want to get arrested, like Mr. Collins?” Caroline asked.
“No,” Mr. Jaworski said, shifting uncomfortably in his seat, “because I’ve never been with a woman.” Let’s be real, Mr. Collins is a pimp
Lila finally got around to opening the box that had been dropped off the previous day. The truth was, she’d forgotten all about the orphaned child she’d ordered from Africa, and the box had sat, untouched, in the foyer of Fowler Crest. It has air holes poked in it, Lila thought. I’m sure he’ll be fine.
Still, despite her lack of enthusiasm at opening the box, Lila couldn’t wait to show off her latest purchase in the halls of Sweet Valley. “I love imported goods,” she said, slicing the packing tape off the box with glee. More human trafficking inside
“Everyone in this school is pregnant,” Jessica fumed to Lila before school on Monday. “Everyone but me.”
“Don’t look at me,” Lila said. “My kid’s on order from Africa.”
“I mean, have you seen Rosa Jameson?” Jessica said. “She’s had five kids since last week.”
“We had a cleaning lady with the same problem,” Lila said soberly. Jessica whines some more